Surviving critics

Hanging around studio doors made Albert Moses a determined actor, one who wasn’t scared of crashing a tricycle carrying James Bond Roger Moore into props. The Mind Your Language star was born to be an entertainer and he’s not giving up, writes Mathures Paul

The “half-wit” Ranjeet Singh brushed up his English well enough in Mind Your Language to land roles in two James Bond films ~ bartender in The Spy Who Loved Me and Sadruddin in Octopussy. Mind Your Language was the opening chapter in the career of Albert Moses, aka Ranjeet Singh, who went on to star in numerous critically-appreciated films and television shows ~ The Man Who Would Be King, The Great Quest, An American Warewolf in London, Jungle Book II, East Is East. Watching good friends from the sets of Mind Your Language disappear, some into oblivion and losing a few to death, Moses trudged along to endear himself to audiences all over the world. The “Indian Gable” (as he was promoted after arriving in England) continues to be a busy bee, producing thrillers for the British television.
The British comedy Mind Your Language was originally aired on ITV between 1977 and 1979, with Albert Moses playing Ranjeet Singh, who never forgot to say “a thousand apologies” every time the teacher, Jeremy Brown (played by Barry Evans), scolded him.
“There was a big search for an actor for the part of Ranjeet Singh in the series. They auditioned more than 12 actors. Comedy comes to me naturally. After reading the script I was determined to land the part. So I approached a Sikh friend of mine to tie an authentic turban to fit my head and bought a beard, stuck it on and practised my lines for the audition in front of a mirror until I was sure I could convince the director and the producer and the casting director that I was the man for the part. I entered the audition room wearing the false beard and the turban, very sheepishly opening the door and peeping in and put on a heavy Indian accent and said ‘a thousand apologies for my intrusion but is this the right room for the audition’, all the time shaking my head. To my surprise I was an instant hit with all those in the casting room and they roared with laughter. The rest was simple. I introduced myself and did a whole scene with the casting director playing the teacher. That was it. Everyone in the room couldn’t stop laughing and I knew I had done it. The line ~ ‘a thousand apologies’ ~ was thought of by writer Vince Powell. The show was seen by 16.7 million viewers in the UK and sold to 23 countries. No other comedy has broken this record yet. Yes, such a comedy will be impossible to make in the UK. We have too many do gooders here now.”
The show was cancelled in 1979 by Michael Grade, then LWT’s Deputy Controller of Entertainment, who considered the stereotyping offensive. That did not stop the show from becoming popular in India, later inspiring the Hindi version ~ Zaban Sambhal Ke. The show continues to be aired on Zee Café in India.
Moses always wanted to be an actor and the sudden ending of the series did not dampen his spirit. “It was of course a difficult world to enter if you have no connections. I worked that out in everyday life singing, dancing and fooling around like an idiot attracts attention and you get noticed. That is exactly what I did and it paid off. It was not easy I hung around the entrance to the studios fooling around until I was called in one day. That was the beginning.”
The Sri Lanka-born actor, started his career in India, from where he moved to Africa to make documentaries and then to the UK. “My reaction on joining the Indian film industry was that it was very flexible and the system works like a factory turning out chocolates and sweets.”
Later he was selected for roles in two James Bond films. “The Spy Who Love Me was the first Bond film I did playing an Egyptian barman. By the time that film was made I had already established myself as a reliable actor in theatre, films and television. And the fact that I always had a smile for everyone made those responsible for the selection of actors feel comfortable. I had already worked in TV and commercials for the casting director of The Spy Who Loved Me. So, she introduced me to the producers and the director and went through the normal audition and they were happy. When the audition for Octopussy came up, there was fierce competition, even some Bollywood stars wanted the part of Sadruddin but it was the same casting director. So, I was called in for audition. I got the part because I was already known to the producers and the fact that I am an accomplished stunt motor cyclist clinched the deal. I also speak Arabic. In the end, of course, there was no need for me to speak Arabic in the film. Being in two Bond films puts me in the record books of ‘not once but twice’ and a clip from The Spy Who Love Me was included in the video 25 Years of Bond.”
On the sets of a Bond film, humourous incidents abound. “My memories of The Spy Who Loved Me was very unusual. The beautiful Barbara Bach, who played the Russian spy, was model acting in her first film and was very nervous about the goings on in the bar. To add to her nervousness the glass of drinks I handed her were knocked over and we couldn’t stop giggling. Shooting for Octopussy was again a memorable affair. A French motor cycle specialist was flown in to train me on a three wheeler. We got onto a three wheeler and he was supposed to drive me to the local park. We lost our way and went around sightseeing before taking help of a policeman for directions. Here’s more. I was driving a tricycle on the sets with Roger Moore. The handle got stuck as I took a turn and drove into the set. Needless to say it did not go down well but we all had a good laugh.”
Moses has worked with quite a few high-profile Hollywood directors, learning in each case something new. “John Glen is extremely meticulous. He tells you what exactly he wants and explains in details before rehearsals. Director John Houston has a completely different approach. I was happy he selected me for a part in the film The Man Who Would Be King (starring Sean Connery). He sat smoking his cigar and said ‘Okay, let’s have the rehearsal, action’. When we finished he said, ‘Good. Shall we try another one’. Next he approached us with more directions. He employed clever tactics to get perfect shots without hurting anybody’s sentiment.”
Being an Asian, it was not easy for Moses to land good roles in the 1970s and ‘80s. “I am sad to say that now we have a trend of producers bringing in Bollywood stars for films and even for TV, which is creating a lot of animosity. The livelihood of British-Asian actors is being threatened.”
Albert Moses is currently working on three-minute thrillers, which he has written. Two have been filmed in Malta and they should go on air early next year. He was recently made a Knight of the Order of St John.